


Light the Way

by beebeetypes



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender, 君の名は。| Kimi no Na wa. | Your Name.
Genre: Body Swap, F/M, Five Years Later, Fluff, Happy Ending, Inspired by Kimi no Na wa. | Your Name., Light Angst, Post-Finale, Romantic Fluff, Soulmates vibe, Zuko is an Awkward Turtleduck, reader is a firebender
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-13
Updated: 2021-02-20
Packaged: 2021-03-07 02:54:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,767
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26439835
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/beebeetypes/pseuds/beebeetypes
Summary: Legend says Agni presents a certain gift during the dawning of a new era.Two flames will intertwine. And like shooting stars across the sky, they will light the way, for each other and to each other.
Relationships: Zuko (Avatar) & Reader, Zuko (Avatar)/Reader
Comments: 19
Kudos: 87





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> I couldn't get the idea out of my head and here we are :)  
> Essentially, Zuko and (Y/N) will be switching bodies and seeing/living the lives of the other from that perspective. 
> 
> For the sake of organization, I will note the POV at the top of the sections and anything in italics is the character's inner thoughts. 
> 
> And also, this was inspired by the movie Your Name (gave me lots of feelings 10/10 recommend).
> 
> Thank you for reading!!

They say the dragons are the original Firebenders. 

Fire. The element of power, ambition. The source of warmth, and the very essence of life. 

Deep within every fire bender lies an inner flame. One that ignites the spirits and lights the way toward our destiny.

* * * * *

Once in a while, when (Y/N) wakes up, she finds herself crying. 

Just as often, for Zuko, the sensation that he’s lost something lingers for a long time after he wakes.

* * * * *

Zuko sits up erratically in the middle of the night. A gentle breeze is coming through the window. He shuts his eyes against the moonlight and tries to grasp the fleeting dream before it leaves him again. 

He saw _her_ , he’s sure of it. 

_But who is she?_

He tries to concentrate on her face, her long hair clipped back with a red brooch. A simple white and gold bracelet wrapped around her right wrist. Zuko can’t let her slip away again, can’t forget her again. 

_What was her name?_

He pulls on a robe and walks down to his office. _It’s time to write to my uncle_. 

* * * * *

On the other side of the fire nation, she awakened just as quickly, breathing heavily but she didn’t quite know why.

_I need to remember him. There’s something I’m already forgetting._

(Y/N) has been having more and more dreams. They always begin and end the same. With the realization that she’s had this dream before, and that she’s going to forget it soon.

She hangs onto the blurry image of him behind her eyelids. A tall man with raven hair. 

_There was something about his eyes._

_Gold._

But there was more. She had to remember. 

A scar.

She gulped as recognition set in. _Why am I dreaming of the Fire Lord?_

* * * * *

Upon receiving a distressed letter from his nephew, Iroh set out for the royal palace the next morning. For he knew exactly what the young Fire Lord was talking about. 

Once they were sitting in Zuko’s office, after a cup of tea and plenty of reassurance, Iroh began explaining. 

There’s another comet that not many know about-- the Zaige comet. Rumored to come around every twenty generations or so. And its effects only felt if the spirits deem it worthy. 

Legend says Agni presents this gift during the dawning of a new era. The Fire Lord’s spirit, his inner flame, will dance with that of another bender; and by looking through the eyes of another, he will be strengthened. 

The peak of this phenomenon is said to manifest in a shower of shooting stars across the sky. The dragon spirits celebrating the rise of a Fire Lord destined for greatness. 

Iroh hugs his nephew tightly. He’s only been Fire Lord for five years, and already, he’s done so much _good_. The spirits see it too. 

These dreams are a blessing. Through them, Zuko and the other Firebending girl will learn something that only they can teach each other. 

* * * * *

As Iroh explained, their memories will improve as the comet arrives closer throughout the next few months. Soon, the dreams will evolve into more.

Zuko gets to work right away. And the first time they switched bodies, he was prepared. He pinpointed her location and sent Iroh to explain the legends to her as well.

They agree to leave letters for each other to stay updated during the switches. And they agree not to meet. Iroh warned that seeing each other while switched could anger the spirits and lead to bad luck, or even a permanent switch. 

* * * * * 

The anticipation grew with each sunrise.

“What is she like, Uncle?” Zuko asked. 

Iroh chuckled. “The spirits chose wisely. Her inner flame burns just as brightly as yours. Like twins, even” 

Zuko liked that answer.

_(Y/N). A healer. A Firebender._

Breathing new life, new healing to the nation.


	2. Fruit Tarts and Fire Lilies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> While (Y/N) is in the palace, Zuko is gathering flowers. And their roles, seemingly worlds apart, are a little more similar than they thought.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Organization:  
> I will note the POV at the top of the sections and anything in italics is the character's inner thoughts.
> 
> Thank you for reading!! :)

POV: (Y/N) as Zuko

“Come in” she answered, straightening the hairpin into place. The Fire Lord needed to look like a Fire Lord after all.

A short boy holding a dessert plate opened the door tentatively. He walked into the room and bowed respectfully.

_Shoot, what is the customary royal response? To bow? To stand? Say words?_

“Please, have a seat” were the decided words. She had no idea who the young boy was in front of her, nor the reason for this meeting.

“How can I help you?” she continued. Hoping to maintain just enough normalcy to avoid suspicion.

The young boy’s eyes widened. “Oh, Lord Zuko, you have done more than enough.”

He shifted in the chair slightly. “I am here to offer my sincerest gratitude. Thank you.” He bowed again. “I hope I am not bothering you sir, you asked me to update you and I just wasn’t sure when the best time was.” He placed the plate down. “And I brought your favorite dessert as well.” 

He brought his hands to his lap, smoothing his palms over the pale fabric. The cooking utensils poking out of his pockets indicated his position as a palace chef. He couldn’t be older than 16.

_But what updates was he referring to?_

Trying to act as composed as possible, “Oh, of course. Now is good. Um. How uh...what is the update?”

The young chef broke into a huge smile. “My sister. She is doing much better. The healers are saying she might be able to go home within 2 days! They say I did the right thing bringing her there when I did, that I am a good brother.”

He placed a hand over his knee, emphasizing the following words. “I would not have been able to be a good brother without your good graces and support, my lord. Thank you for allowing me the time off to help care for her. And for covering the expenses. Like you insisted, I will be returning her home to our mother and staying some time. It means a lot to me to be able to do that.”

_Fire Lord Zuko was helping him care for his sister._ The genuine smile on the young boy’s face, the ease with which he spoke, showed his clear admiration for the nation’s leader. 

Before she knew it, she was smiling too. The idea of a kind, generous, clearly approachable man filled her mind. _His talk of bringing a new era of peace and love was not just for show. Zuko was committed to it, and he was acting on it. The Fire Lord was a man of his word._

She realized she had been quiet a heartbeat too long. “I am very pleased to hear your sister is doing better. Your family needs you and I am happy to help as I can. Please, take the time you need.”

The young boy nodded fondly. “Thank you, Lord Zuko. I don’t take it lightly. We are most grateful.”

He stood and bowed again before exiting the room. 

She chuckled to herself. _Who knew the Fire Lord had a soft side?_ It filled her with hope knowing he was kind and caring both in the spotlight and behind the scenes. Agni knows one can never be sure with the Fire Lords, her grandmother used to say. 

Her eyes landed on a small portrait on the wall. Zuko stood with a shy smile next to a widely grinning Iroh, both in front of what looked like a tea shop. _He looks so happy there._ She looked back to the piles of paperwork, frowning at how they seemed taller than this morning. _I hope he feels like that all the time._

Reaching for the stationary, she pulled out a piece of paper to begin writing.

_Zuko,_

_Your flames may have been absent in the royal hall, but your warmth remained. In the form of your kindness towards the staff. A young boy, a chef I believe, came by with good news of his family’s health. It fills me with warmth too, knowing how you care about your people. I think we’ve needed someone like you for a very long time now._

_I tried to maintain your regal image, but I can’t figure out this hairpin. It doesn’t matter I guess, for it goes unnoticed. No one looks away from your charming face long enough._

_P.S. strawberry fruit tarts are my favorite too_

_(Y/N)_

* * *

POV: Zuko as (Y/N)

“We’re out of red jade, moon flower, and banana leaf” shouted the manager in the healer’s hut. 

The place was bustling. All of (Y/N)’s coworkers were briskly walking around, trying to attend to the coughing patients without knocking anything over in the tight space. 

Without any medical training himself, Zuko didn’t know how he could make it through the day, let alone pass as (Y/N). Her reputation had preceded her, he realized it upon the many smiles and sighs of relief from patients when they saw her (or so they thought). 

The effects of her absence, although he was the only one who truly knew of it, were likely manifesting in the form of the long waiting lines and disorder. 

So when the window to get away came up, _This is my chance_ , he thought. 

“I’ll head out for some! You said moon flower, banana leaf, and white jade?” He grabbed a coat and headed for the door.

“Red! Red jade.” The manager looked bewildered. Eyes somewhere between shock and worry.

“White jade is poisonous, you know this” she frowned. “Are you feeling okay?” 

Zuko tried not to panic. “Yes, sorry, it must be one of those days.” Turning to the central desk, “These are the guides?” He picked up a worn, brown leather booklet.

“You haven’t needed them in years, but yes” the manager answered. 

The anxious Fire Lord hurried out the door and toward the hills, still trying to adjust to this switching situation. 

_How does she do this all day every day? It’s exhausting._

_But she sure has a way with people. She is a healer after all._

Using the guide, he found pictures of the medicinal flowers and herbs needed and little helpful notes written along the margins. 

_(Y/N)’s handwriting_ , he smiled. _Her lines lean upwards as mine do. I told uncle it wasn’t that strange._

He was grateful for the opportunity to spend the day in the sun. Agni knows he doesn’t see enough of it some weeks.

The sunlight shone through the clouds much like thoughts of (Y/N) slipped into his mind. 

When he passes by a small stream, he wonders what her life is like outside the healer’s hut. _Does she have a family? What does she do for fun?_

When he passes by a meadow of fire lilies. _Has she always been so kind? What does she dream of?_

When a light breeze flows by. _Why does her hair smell like vanilla?_

When the slightest hint of pink touches the sky as the sun descends. _Is she happy?_

Zuko finds a tree with a soft patch of grass to sit upon. All the herbs are organized carefully inside the basket, with a special surprise wrapped together in a velvet ribbon. He opened the leather-bound book and found a spot beneath the young healer’s writing.

_(Y/N),_

_I found a way to escape into the hills because otherwise, I might have accidentally poisoned someone. I did learn a lot from your notes here, however. Your patients and team miss you. I can tell._

_I took the same routes you take when gathering flowers. It's beautiful. There is so much space to think out here and even more moments to enjoy. Is it weird to say it felt like you were with me today? Well, it did._

_The fire lilies weren’t on the list but I gathered some anyway. They remind me of you. I’ll leave them in the basket for you._

_Zuko_


	3. Unexpected Friends and Unexpected Dates

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Surprise visitors bring new light to (Y/N) and Zuko's perspectives of each other (and stir up some feelings too).

POV: (Y/N) as Zuko

“The bench under the willow has been fixed, Fire Lord Zuko” the elderly advisor spoke softly, although with a faint hint of confusion.

“That’s wonderful,” she responded. She was shuffling through piles of paper, organizing them in a way Zuko hopefully found helpful upon his return when they switched back. She raised an eyebrow in curiosity. _I don’t remember seeing anything about a willow tree._

“It’s been a while since you sat by the turtle duck pond is all. I’m sure they miss you out there” the advisor responded. 

_Turtle ducks! I’ve only seen them in books._

“Um, yes. I may have been in my head a bit these days. But you have a point. I’ll go out there after I finish this last pile” she grinned excitedly.

The advisor chuckled. “I’ll have someone leave out some jasmine tea as well, my lord.”

The pile all but disappeared soon enough and she made her way through the halls, passing by servants who smiled (and sometimes even waved) at her. She eventually found the beautiful willow tree in the Northern gardens. And next to it, a bright blue pond with tiny yellow turtle ducks. She wouldn't admit it if anyone later asked, but tears of excitement formed in the corner of her eyes.

Tentatively stepping closer, she was wary of scaring them off. However, to her absolute delight, the turtle duck babies rushed closer to the edge when they heard her approach. 

_They recognize Zuko._ Her heart swelled when one duckling tapped Zuko’s shoe. _And they like him!_

She giggled at the idea of Zuko, in full Fire Lord regalia, routinely strolling through the gardens. The sun shone almost too brightly, causing beads of sweat beads to form on her temple. She made a mental note to request lighter, more casual clothes later on. 

Along with the jasmine tea, there was a small plate of bread and seeds. The turtle ducks splashed around while she fed them, the sound of the wind blowing through the leaves put her at ease.

She took in the serenity of the spot and smiled at the thought of Zuko sitting where she was sitting now, basking in the peaceful moment. _He has so much to do, so many people demanding answers left and right. A whole nation to take care of._

The royal palace may be a luxurious home, but it is far from being the whimsical playground for royalty that people thought it to be. Perhaps past rulers used it in such ways, but not Zuko. The throne room, meeting rooms, courtyards, even his office, were places where Zuko worked tirelessly to listen to and meet the needs of the nation. 

_I’m glad he has places like this. He’s a capable leader. Not many people know this side of him._

She thought back to the frustrations some felt after the war, when the future was uncertain, when people doubted if a young boy could really be the Fire Lord. 

_They just assumed the worst, but Zuko’s better than that. Strong to the core. Yet gentle, reliable._

Her thoughts were interrupted by the advisor. “Fire Lord Zuko, you have a visitor. Sokka from the Southern Water Tribe.” 

A young man with a ponytail, more or less Zuko’s age, waved enthusiastically behind him. 

“Your fiery highness! I thought you could use a surprise” he smiled widely before reaching to pull Zuko into a hug. 

The boy’s warm energy was contagious and so she hugged him back as if he were her own friend. “Sokka, it is good to see you! What brings you in?” 

“We finished the building plans with a week to spare so I thought I’d come a few days early. Maybe Suki and I can go on a day trip or something.” The boy took a seat and turned to the pond in front of them.

“Hey, there are babies here now! Are these like the ones you told me about?” His blue eyes shone with excitement. 

“I… think so?” she replied.

“You said you and your mom would spend time out here feeding them. The mother turtle duck bit you for being a rascal,” he elbowed his friend’s side.

She laughed heartily. “Sounds like me, yes. What else did I tell you?”

“You said this is one of the happiest places in the palace for you. Your own little spot that you couldn’t wait to show your kids someday.” Sokka’s blue eyes turned to her, revealing the depth of some past conversation.

“It is a good little spot, isn’t it?” she waved her fingers through the water, watching the ripples. Imagining a tiny Zuko running along the pond edges. _I wonder what his laugh sounds like. (How strange, to know such random details about someone but not knowing how they laugh)._

“Yep. It’s what you deserve, buddy” Sokka smiled gently. 

They settled into a comfortable silence, watching the baby turtle ducks line up behind their mother. 

“But for me, the best spot in this entire palace is wherever Suki is! I’m going to find her,” he patted the Fire Lord’s shoulder before sprinting back into the royal halls. 

She turned back to the pond and thought also of a tiny Zuko sitting with his mother, the Fire Lady who went missing so many years ago. There has to be more to that story. _Maybe one day I'll ask him._

A rogue baby turtle duck darted toward the edge of the pond before its mother caught him and (Y/N) couldn't help but smile. _Zuko wants kids, huh? What a sight that would be, Zuko chasing the little ones around the pond._ She felt her cheeks warm up but decided to ignore it.

She poured a cup of jasmine tea and opened the notepad she had brought out with her. 

_Zuko,_

_I can’t believe I didn’t know about this turtle pond! The whole spot is absolutely beautiful, very peaceful, and quiet under the willow. I hope you spend as much time as you can out here, relaxing the tension you obviously carry in your shoulders. It’s mine to carry today and I don’t know how you do it._

_Also, surprise! Your friend Sokka came to visit. What a cute guy! He’s off to see Suki though so you might not see him for a few days. Anyways, we talked about what the pond means to you, and I’m really happy to know you have a happy place. It’s like I can feel you here, actually._

_The baby ducks missed you! They swam toward you quickly. Come see them more often. For you and for them. And for me too now hopefully, for the happiness I felt here will surely linger. I hope it can be of some use to you on a bad day. Like the piles I left on the desk, separate instructions there, but hopefully cut down on your office time and you can come here instead._

_(Y/N)_

_P.S. jasmine tea is my new favorite_

  
  


* * *

POV: Zuko as (Y/N)

“Hey (y/n), how are you?” 

Zuko was leaning over the counter of the center station organizing some supplies. He looked up to find a young boy who also worked there. Yun, or something like that. 

“Good. Just preparing for tomorrow” He’d noticed (y/n) liked to do that, so he took care to arrange the gauze in short piles in order of size. 

Yun scratched the back of his neck. _Nervous. About what?_

“Yeah um, I’ve been watching you--uh, work” the boy looked down sheepishly. “It’s just you’re so good at everything here.”

“Thanks. Just takes practice.” 

“So did you always know you wanted to be a healer? You’re a natural” 

_Well, he’s right about that._ Zuko had seen some of (y/n)’s returning patients, with perfectly placed gauze and significant improvements, not to mention their elevated spirits. 

_She is definitely talented_. “I think so….I can’t imagine doing anything else” 

The boy took a step closer. Hand cupping his elbow. _Still nervous?_

“You’re wearing your hair differently today. I like it, it looks good like that” he smiled. 

Zuko wasn’t sure where this was going. But he knew making up some excuse to end the conversation could cause suspicion, so despite himself, he searched for something to say.

“...thanks,” he decided upon. 

“So I was thinking,” Yun continued, “Do you want to go to dinner sometime?”

_Go to what, now?_ Zuko looked at the boy with a piercing gaze. “Oh um….I suppose an outing would be good for everyone” he tried to divert from the implication of a more intimate outing. 

But Yun wasn’t one to budge. “I mean with me. A date.”

“Oh uh…” 

“I want to get to know you. You’re really pretty. And kind.” 

Zuko didn’t like the way the young boy’s eyes fluttered around. He didn’t like the way he fixated on the (y/e/c) eyes before him, nor the way they followed the curls of hair cascading down rounded cheeks. And he especially did not like the way the boy looked down to the pair of soft lips.

Every morning that Zuko woke up with that distinct feeling, when he woke to light shining through (y/n)’s window instead of his own, he’d rush to the nearest mirror.

[It had been a long time since Zuko had entertained the idea of a crush, admiration, whatever people called this, but it felt as if it had taken root and blossomed overnight.] _She’s beautiful_ , he thought each time he saw her face smiling back at him.

Standing here now, he realizes he is not the only one who thinks so, judging by this flustered boy in front of him. Zuko felt a hot flame ignite in the pit of his stomach, threatening to spill into his clenched fist. 

“I don’t know…” he began. 

The young fire lord felt suddenly protective of the young girl he has come to know. _She deserves the best. Who even is this guy?_

He desperately wanted to say no, but deep down he knew that wasn’t his choice to make. 

“How about you ask me again tomorrow?” he faked a smile.

And with that, Yun nodded and exited with a quirky smile on his face. Zuko watched him leave, and then decided to lock the door for good measure. 

He finished sorting the supplies between stations with perhaps more force than necessary. The flame is still alive in his stomach as he thinks about (y/n)’s response tomorrow. 

_What if she says yes?_ Agni, help him. The flame grows hotter. 

_Not that I care._ Oh, but he does. The flame is still there. 

Zuko grips the quill harshly, tries his best to avoid smudging the ink as he writes.

_(Y/N),_

_Some guy asked you on a date today. I said to ask back tomorrow._ _I ~~t’s not my place to~~ _ _I ~~worry that~~ _ ~~~~ _I ~~’m just saying tha~~ _ _I hope whatever choice you make, it brings you happiness. ~~Whatever his idea, it better be good.~~ _

_It got me thinking. If I were to plan a date, I’d take you to the creek beds behind the palace. They lead to a hidden waterfall a few miles down. My mother and I used to decorate lanterns during the fall for the winter solstice. They are supposed to be symbolic and mean something. So the last one I made was red with a golden dragon and white suns lining the borders with silk. To light me through the dark._

_That’s what I would have us do. Lanterns and releasing them near the waterfall._

Zuko

_P.S. the fire lily in the supply box is for you_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i went back and forth about this one but decided to write another switched scene before a regular one. and also to write zuko as a little more straightforward and confident (its five years after the finale and i wanted to cut the boy some slack lol)


	4. Fleeting Moments

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With the guidance of gentle words and encouraging friends, (Y/N) and Zuko realize they may be feeling more than they let on. Regular POV.

The waning moon brought with her the passing of time and prolonged dreams. It felt like being inside a raindrop, vivid colors reflecting off a glassy surface, the gentle motion between floating and falling. 

When their feet touched the earth, the rain splattered all around them, decorating the delicate leaves of flowers with heavy droplets. They flowed down the stems. And when they soaked into the soil surrounding the roots, the field blossomed into kaleidoscopes of pink, purple, yellow. 

Zuko spotted her first. She was standing at the base of the hill, hand shielding her eyes from the sun as she watched a faint rainbow brim through the clouds.

The sounds of gravel beneath his feet alerted him that he was walking. The turning of her head told him that he had called out for her. 

(Y/N) beamed like the sun overhead. She started running towards him along a smooth path. 

Before the distance could close, the earth shook below and brought them to a halt. Consciousness was beckoning for them. 

(Y/N) only ran faster. Zuko reached out a hand. His fingers grazed the ribbon around her wrist.

The light spun and blurred at the edges. 

Although (Y/N)’s wrist ached and Zuko’s hand flexed, neither remembered the fleeting moment when they woke up. 

* * *

At the top of her supply basket was a beautiful fire lily. (Y/N) held it to her nose and smiled as the silky petals brushed her cheeks. 

“You seem to have become a big fan of those,” the hut manager smiled as she passed by. 

(Y/N) shrugged. She had never received flowers as a gift before. _It puts me a dangerously short step from giddiness._

She pulled the notebook out from the basket and opened it to the last note. _Of course he would mark it with a folded corner_ , she chuckled. His sentences were scribbled out rather messily, but the important parts of the blue ink caused her eyes to widen and her thoughts to race. 

She imagined a pair of eager faces under the night sky, illuminated by soft flames in their palms, enchanted by the sound of falling water.

It had been a long time since (Y/N) had thought about dating. She always reminded herself that she didn’t have the time, not with her family depending on her, not with the work that needed to be done. But she allowed herself this instance of wishful thinking, of imagining how she could show Zuko her latest firebending trick, the one where the flames take the shape of fireworks. (Y/N) leaned against the wall and read the words again. _“That’s what I would have us do.”_

The moment was interrupted by quiet steps approaching her. She turned to find Yun waving cheerfully and she felt herself settle back into her long-established ways. _I can’t, it would be a disaster. It wouldn’t be fair to him._

He greeted her politely and asked for the second time the question that she was hearing for the first. She said she couldn’t and listed the reasons she repeated to herself over the years. 

But his smile did not waver. Instead, he asked with a gentle voice, “How about as friends then?” 

And so that's how the two of them found themselves munching on fire flakes in the town square on a handful of occasions, often debating over old stories. 

“What are you talking about?” Yun’s eyes widened with mock bewilderment. “ _A Tale of Two Spears_ is _way better_ than _The Song of the Dragons_.”

(Y/N) shook her head adamantly. “I don’t know how to tell you this, but you simply cannot be more wrong” 

Yun clicked his tongue, sitting back against the bench. “The journey of the hero is _the_ story, it's a classic.” 

“I mean, sure, it is theatrical, but there is something sweet about _The Song of the Dragons_. I can’t quite explain it.” (Y/N) smiled and popped another flake into her mouth. 

Teetering on a teasing smirk, Yun nudged her shoulder. “I can. Our (Y/N) is a secret romantic.” 

“I am not!” she threw a couple of flakes, purposefully missing him by a foot. A luxury his words had not granted her. 

They settled into a peal of comfortable laughter, watching a group of children run by with a kite. The heat had subsided, leaving cool purple tones against the walls and sky. 

Yun spoke again almost cautiously. “You’re the youngest of the group at work.” It was more of a statement and less of a question.

“Only by a couple of years. Then it’s you.” 

“I want to share something with you if that’s okay.”

When she nodded, he continued. “I wanted to leave when I was your age. New opportunities for musicians were expanding back then. But I talked myself out of it. I thought if I entered a stable line of work here, saved some money, played it safe, then I would be able to do it.” He chuckled, fingers running down his knee. “I got injured a month before I was set to leave. And then I really couldn’t go. I realized then I had put my dreams and desires so far to the side, I almost convinced myself I forgot they were there.” 

He turned to look at her. She had placed a reassuring hand on his shoulder. “I wish someone had told me that pretending a part of your life isn’t there doesn’t make it go away. And pretending you don’t care for it doesn't make you forget. You can’t let life pass you by (Y/N).”

(Y/N) conjures to mind an image of a much younger her, jumping uninhibited from one activity to the other. She sees in Yun the same small tiredness that has latched onto her, the kind that settles into one’s bones if you’re not careful. 

Somewhere in the distance, the scuffling sounds of children playing catch echoes. The lamp posts now cast a dimly yellow glow. And it occurs to her it has been a while since she had a friend. Someone who cared to impart insight, share a concern with. Someone who knew about the purple hues as equally as the yellow glow.

“You’re right, Yun,” her eyes soft with emotion. “Thank you,” she paused, “It can be hard to remember that when you’re in the middle of it. I think I needed to hear that. For a long time now, probably.” 

Then she smiled and nudged him back. “We’ll be okay. Starting with getting you back into music.”

He chuckled. “That seems to be the plan.” Then he tapped his chin theatrically as if thinking. “As for you, you need to get out of your own head. You’ve been acting weird.” Before (Y/N) could protest, he waved his hand upward, “We’ve all noticed.” Yun continued almost bashfully. “The girls, uh, they thought it might be me, being the only guy there and all.” He coughed. “But that is very obviously not it.”

Her confused glare only seemed to fuel his amusement. “I’m just saying, if there is someone on your mind these days, perhaps connected to all these flowers that suddenly appeared, if they are starting to wiggle into your bubble, I hope you let them. And like everything else you do, I hope you do it proudly.”

(Y/N) did not try to protest then, only chewed another fire flake pensively. Her fingers brushed her right wrist but found only bare skin and the absence of a soft ribbon. _How strange._ _Where did it go?_ she wondered. 

When she couldn’t find a coherent explanation for either, she opted for playfulness. “And you say _I’m_ the secret romantic around here?” 

Yun only grinned. “You reveal more with that than you know.”

“I’m joking,” she laughed. Then, more quietly, “I know you’re right. I kinda hate it.” 

~ ~ ~

Later, when it was just her and the light of the moon shining through her window, (Y/N) finally acknowledged the words that circled through her mind on their own accord. _“That’s what I would have us do. Near the waterfall.”_

The sounds of that waterfall were far, far away. But it didn’t matter. 

Like they often seemed to do these days, thoughts of Zuko lulled her to sleep like waves meeting the shore.

* * *

For the first time in a very, very long time, Zuko’s schedule was clear for the hour after breakfast. All memos had been attended to, outgoing orders delivered, and the air in his study was crisper. A small unfinished pai sho game was tucked away in the corner and a green plant sat on the windowsill. He chuckled thinking of the culprit of both objects pacing around, settling into the room, leaving tiny notes peeking out from under piles of scrolls, smooth lines of writing slanted upwards. 

So with his free hour, he ended up in the garden courtyard, sharpening a practically forgotten sword while Sokka delivered the punchline of a long-awaited joke. 

His laugh had a sprinkle of lightness. It didn’t go unnoticed by the observant water tribe man.

“Is there something we don’t know about, bud?” Sokka was nothing if not blunt. “Some _one_ , maybe?” 

Zuko’s eyebrows furrowed. “What do you mean?”

“You’re acting differently.” He shrugged, playing off the friendly accusation by polishing his sword. “Suki said she hasn’t noticed anyone, but I don’t know,” he tilted his head slightly, “something is not adding up.”

“Probably because there is nothing _to_ add” Zuko huffed.

“I mean, I know you’re busy with being Fire Lord.” He changed the pitch of his voice to resemble Zuko’s, “And that you’re ‘never happy’ and all,” he laughed, “but I just don’t think that's the case anymore.” 

“So the calculations have turned into a case now?” Zuko chuckled. 

The back and forth went on for a moment, but it was just as quickly forgotten, as there was a long-overdue rematch on hold from the days of camping in an abandoned air temple. 

Neither was one to budge, either with swords or with words. Despite the clanging of metal filling the hot air, Sokka was unwavering in his pursuit for information. He paused, searching for the right words. 

“You know it would be okay, right?” 

“What would?”

“If someone were on your mind.”

“Sokka,” Zuko shook his head, “I cannot possibly entertain the idea. We have plenty of work that needs attention. Amends to-”

“Making amends does not mean depriving yourself of happiness.” Sokka interrupted, lowering his sword to look his stubborn friend in the eyes. Zuko stared back with a look of sadness, almost guilt. He moved towards Zuko, then placed a hand on his shoulder and led him to the grass by a fountain.

Sokka spoke purposefully, needing his words to not only be heard but understood. “You don’t need to fix the world to earn a part in it.”

A memory found Zuko then, of when he tried to shuffle a family of turtle ducks inside the palace walls on a particularly cold winter night. He got as far as the first pillar in the hallway before his mother appeared, hands on her hips, smiling with endearment. ‘You have so much love to give, my darling’, she had said. 

“And before you argue, don’t. A friend just knows sometimes. Even if you don’t,” Sokka smiled.

Between that winter and now, Zuko had come to learn the power of love. He gave it, accepted it, shared it. In the end, it was what saved him. But Zuko had never learned how to navigate romantic love. The stories, the songs, the delicate hope that such a thing could exist for him, that was deep inside him. It was unnerving, how these feelings could sit in his chest, burning like the flames he effortlessly wielded. Always on the edge of spilling. 

He told Sokka as much. His words poured out like the sounds of water splashing behind them. And Sokka nodded understandingly. He watched as a red and white ribbon danced around with the movements of Zuko’s wrists.

“You need to realize you deserve happiness as much as anyone. In the _now,_ as you are. Don’t hide from it.” He paused. “And I’m just saying, if there is someone, she must be great to have caught your eye. And she's also lucky because you’re just as great.”

~ ~ ~

Determined to enjoy the calm moments before his duties would call him away, Zuko laid on the grass as the sun warmed him. His fingers sought the comfort of the silky material wrapped around his wrist. He thought of an old piece of training advice. Stay grounded, stay grounded.

Zuko didn’t feel very grounded now. He wasn’t sure he even wanted to, really. Not when his thoughts floated high above his head, so high in the sky that the wind beneath the clouds could send them across hills and buildings, and land right in her palms.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!! I know its been a few months since the last update but I just had too many thoughts and not enough decisiveness (plus i ended up getting self-conscious about it and it was a whole thing) BUT it is here and i am excited to share!
> 
> let me know what you think!! the next ch is 85% done, just needs some polishing :) 
> 
> thank you for reading!! <3


	5. Ripples

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zuko and (Y/N) learn they have both known similar fears and loneliness, albeit in different ways. Sometimes a change in perspective is needed to see that. 
> 
> They're also starting to realize they may kinda sorta maybe feel the same way about each other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: angst, mention of family history

POV: (Y/N) as Zuko

It was one of those things that goes unnoticed until it is brazenly displayed. Like looking at a reflection on the surface of the water, the movement is there but the ripples don’t really come into focus.

Zuko had been Fire Lord for years now. Every annual summer festival, he would stand at the top of the royal stairwells, shoulders broader than the year before, his face a little more tired, but his chin always sturdier with growing confidence. 

“What is this?” the young healer tried to steady the tremble in her voice. 

In front of the vanity mirror, a pair of scissors sat beside a hairbrush, white towels, and a bowl of warm water. 

“It’s the end of the month, your majesty. Would you like to change the timing of this request?”

“No need...” With that, the attendant bowed deeply and exited the room, leaving her with a sea of thoughts. 

Zuko had been Fire Lord for years, but his hair was not an inch longer than the first summer festival following his coronation.

It was the kind of thing that went unnoticed until it literally stared back at you. The answers to her questions were right there, she only had to look.

Deep in the crevices of the royal palace, there is an underground office that collects dust and stores reminders of a war-torn family. At the bottom of the pile was a single portrait containing four faces, two of which became lost princesses, and the other two inherited the crown. 

The chatter of the town occasionally spoke of the royal family traits, and eyes, the ambition, the madness. In the shadows of fear, at the very beginning, whispers of dread would question if a young boy would turn into a madman like the ruler before him. 

The fears would subside quickly. But apparently not for Zuko.

She looked into the mirror and saw the reflection of a kind, honorable man. She saw the gentle curve of lips that form a soft smile and the molten gold irises that glimmer in the light. She saw raven strands of hair just barely caressing the edges of a healed scar. 

Soon, she was crying silently. The whispers had always been wrong, she wanted to shout.

“You look nothing like him, Zuko” she whispered into the air. She promised herself she would tell him again someday.

In the meantime, she collected medicinal herbs and plants into a bowl and mashed them together before applying the paste to the roots of the soft hair. When she rinsed it out, the strands were silky smooth. She traced the hair between two fingers and let the sounds of clipping scissors fill the room. 

The next order of business was to find acrylic paints and brushes. Zuko needed to see what she saw. And if he couldn’t, she was determined to show him. 

She opened the door to find General Iroh. “I was hoping you would still be up.” He lifted a bag of tea leaves in his hand, “Care to indulge me with a cup?” 

The young healer turned back into the room with the old man behind her. They had, surprisingly, not had much time to talk, considering he was the only other being who knew of the unique situation in which they found themselves. Iroh looked at the vanity before turning to her. 

“Does he worry about it?” she frowned. 

The older man nodded sadly. “More than he lets on, yes.”

Her eyes began to prickle with the tears threatening to spill over. “It shouldn’t.” She shook her head and the tears fell. “He could never be...it’s not possible.”

Iroh placed a gentle hand on her shoulder with natural ease, like it had been done too many times to count. 

“He’s too kind, too good, for that to loom over him.” Her voice no longer cracked as she spoke with certainty. “He shines too brightly for that” 

Two cups of tea and a long conversation later, she felt more at ease. 

Iroh smiled. “You’re very kind to my nephew. I know he would appreciate these words.”

“It’s only the truth,” you shrugged.

“Something tells me he feels the same towards you. He doesn’t know how to say it directly, but Zuko is very telling if you know where to look. He doesn’t change anything you leave behind.”

 _The plant, it hasn’t wilted_ , she thought to herself. 

“Like the plant which he now waters every day. For you.” 

_For me_ , she repeated to herself, feeling a familiar smile return.

“You’ve become very special to him.”

_So has he._

~~~

_Dear Zuko,_

_I have a surprise for you, but you have to promise to be patient because I’m still working on it. Your uncle is my accomplice so don’t try to get any information out of him. I really hope you enjoy it._

_I thought a lot about what I wanted to say about today, but it comes down to the same thought. So, I am saying thank you. For watering my plant. For the way you’re leading. For all the flowers. Thank you for being exactly as you are. And for what it's worth, you can always count on me._

_(Y/N)_

_p.s. Really, don’t ask. The only clue you get is to dress comfortably._

* * *

  
POV: Zuko as (Y/N)

  
Zuko had always hated aspects of palace life. He disliked having others worry about his every move, or worrying about details that barely mattered. It wasn’t like the world would fall apart if the dinner soup contained different peppers or whatever trivial details. 

While years and experience had brought him to appreciate the care that goes into the palace flow, he couldn’t help but feel like there was an edge of detachment. 

So tonight, walking into (Y/N)’s home was a welcomed change in atmosphere. As soon as he stepped foot through the door, he was met with chattering, the clanging of pots, and three excited children running towards him. 

“You’re back!” the young girl who had wrapped her arms around his legs exclaimed. 

Zuko had never been around kids much, but he found their grandiose storytelling and lively attitudes endearing. Even now, as he sat to remove his shoes, they leaned against him, eager to share tidbits about the day. 

“(Y/N)?” a voice called from the aroma-filled kitchen. Wooden boards and chopped vegetables were scattered around the counters. 

Zuko began gathering them into a pot, placing his hands at the bottom to bring the water to a boil. From over his shoulder, he heard the exasperated whispers of the women. It had been a poor season for some of the crops. Their wallets were becoming even drier, especially after repairs of the house. 

The sound of the boiling bubbles grew as he became deep in thought. 

One of the women took notice and smiled. “You always find such clever ways, (Y/N)” she gestured at the pot. Her tone shifted as if recalling a memory, “Just like the last time.” Before leaving the room, she left with a statement that sounded more like a task than a reassurance, “It will be a few difficult months ahead, but we'll be okay.” 

Much later, Zuko would come to learn about these times. How a young girl in the vast sea of the fire nation grew up to welcome the weight of responsibility on her shoulders at the same time as him. How they both learned the meaning of sacrifice, strength, loneliness. How the hard-earned lessons rooted deep within them became a source of fuel rather than a hindrance. 

Meanwhile, in the other room, the young children were huddled around a table with books and loose pages. It was a daily ritual, they saved their lingering questions for (Y/N) and listened to her explain an array of topics. 

Tonight’s topic was geography. He took his place among them and answered questions about the changing maps. Zuko had commanded meeting rooms and presented ideas and orders with regal elegance for years now. But sitting here with eager eyes looking to him for knowledge of balance and peace, a familiar feeling, like a hymn flowing through his chest, and took hold. 

“It might not seem like much yet,” he said, “But this is only the beginning.”

“How do we know when it's done?” the child to his left asked. 

“When we make things right. When we help the other nations recover what was lost. And then we work together, from a place of trust rather than fear,” he concluded with a small smile.

“You said Fire Lord Zuko would do that.”

“I said that?” Zuko turned to his left, intrigued by the words. 

“You said if anyone could do it, it was him.” The child nodded.

 _She said that._ The thought of her sitting where he is now, speaking words of praise, circled through his mind. His face was frozen in surprise. 

From his other side, the older child nudged his elbow. “You did! The same night mom said you were blushing because you thought he was handsome.”

That was all that was needed to send Zuko dangerously close to full-body shock which manifested in the form of a sappy smile. 

_Handsome. She thinks of me._ The light, airy feeling courses through him in waves. 

“You’re doing it again” he heard as the warmth rushed to his cheeks. 

~~~

_(Y/N),_

_Just when I thought I had discovered all your talents, I learned that you’re a great teacher too. We reviewed some geography tonight. You take care of others so well, it's so easy to see why the kids adore you. I hope you’re being taken care of too._

_I’m not sure what I did to earn your support, but it means a lot to me. Please know I want to support you as well, however I can. When this is all over, I hope you’ll let me._

_Zuko_

_p.s. For now, I had something else in mind. Check by the window._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was nervous to post this bc I don't write angst often but here it is. This is as angsty as its gonna get, everything after this is going to be fluffy and wrapping up our wonderful characters :)
> 
> I had this headcanon concept of Zuko not cutting his hair because he didn't want any comments about him looking anything like Ozai. So I wrote it into this story and ran with it. 
> 
> I went back and forth on whether i should keep this chapter or scrap it completely but i figured this is a side (with fears and sadness) they need to see to learn and grow from each other. 
> 
> In the last chapter, they both realized they need to be more receptive to love. And now, they're starting to untangle how they feel about each other. 
> 
> Next chapter, the cute fluff will return!!


End file.
